Friday, January 1, 2010

January 1st...

We've begun a new year.
New experiences - new goals - new challenges.
I feel both excited and overwhelmed by the prospect of what is supposed to be a fresh start. 

Overwhelmed because nothing is really new.  I was still mad at 12:01 about the things I was mad about at 11:59.  I'm still carrying around the same baggage in my heart and the same weight on my shoulders.  Overwhelmed because I'm supposed to be refreshed and ready to take on the world, when in reality I feel burned out and ready for a real, long holiday.

Excited because there will be some new beginnings - in my attitude, in my routine and in my head  New projects to do, new experiences to share with my family and friends.  A new spring. A new fall.

And one more thing.  I am hopeful.  Hopeful that this new year will bring more good memories than bad (this last year had way too many bad); hopeful that I will connect more deeply and intimately with friends - new and old.  Hopeful that our marriage will grow deeper and more real with each passing day.  Hopeful that our home will be more of a peaceful place for all of us; and that that same peace will enter my heart as I try to deal with still being treated like, and feeling like, an outsider.
And mostly, I am hopeful that God will reveal Himself to me in very real and obvious ways; and also hopeful that I will be able to sit in quiet and stillness and listen for His word and guidance.

As I was making my goals, and my list of things to do in 2010, I was thinking of a verse that could be my banner this year.  There was one that popped into my head after a few days of thinking. 

Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

I have a feeling I will need it each and everyday.  Which I will admit, frightens me a bit.  But at the same time, it gives me hope. 

So, this begs the question...what is it that I want to do this year??
Well, I have several serious goals, and a few fun "things I want to do in 2010"...but you'll have to come back tomorrow to find out what they are!

Have a restful and blessed day.

1 comment:

Kim said...

Have a beautiful and blessed New Year!